Hi. My name is Jessica. And I am a guac-aholic.

My addiction started at Mexican restaurants at a young age where my Mom made guacamole a “forbidden fruit”. She was always saying “Not too many chips or you won’t eat your dinner”. My addiction only grew when I got a waitressing job in high school at Pappasito’s Cantina. We had bowls and bowls and bowls of the most amazing guacamole available at any given moment. Which for people with no self control which means me, every time I would go back to chat with the chefs I was shoveling guacamole into my mouth on freshly fried tortilla chips like it was my job.

Up until a few years ago I had no idea that this was unhealthy. I knew the chips weren’t the greatest, but I just doubled the amount of guacamole on each chip and figured I was good. But one day one of my coworkers told me she had not had guacamole in years because of how fattening it was. I rolled my eyes and thought ‘Stop haten on the guac skinnybitch’. But I immediately ran to my desk and googled nutrition of an avocado and proceeded to openly weep.  Who knew a fruit (or is it a vegetable? I always forget.) was that high in fat? Is it good fat? Yes. Is it good in moderation? Absolutely.  Did I eat it in moderation? Hell no.

So recently when I was looking for this Chocolate Cream Pie recipe, I stumbled upon a recipe for a fake guacamole. It’s made with Broccoli and looks exactly like delicious, creamy guacamole. But I am not gonna lie to you, it does not taste like guacamole and it really doesn’t even taste like broccoli. It does however taste like a delicious dip that goes fabulously on tortilla chips. I liked it hot, Jorge liked it cold…and between the 6 people at dinner, there was none left. So while it might not be as good as guacamole, it’s a very delicious dip. Just don’t try to sell it to a guacamole addict as “guacamole” because that’s pretty much the equivalent of giving someone a margarita without tequila.

P.S. Did I mention it’s ass friendly?



Recipe Note: Leave the little pinch of curry in. Seriously.


2 cups cooked broccoli
1 garlic clove
1 small jalapeno, seeded
1 green onion stalk
2 oz asagio cheese, shredded
1/4 cup light sour cream
1/4 cup light mayo made with olive oil
1/3 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1/2 teaspoon curry
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon lemon juice


Combine all ingredients in a food processor (or blender). Process until smooth.

If I am coming over, serve it hot. If Jorge is coming over, serve it chilled.

But either way serve it with tortilla chips. Or if you are crazy, serve it with fresh veggies.

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25 Responses to “Broc-a-mole”

  1. 1

    The Waspy Redhead — June 23, 2011 @ 1:06 am

    I love guacamole too! This sounds so interesting, I will definitely be trying this soon. Also, I giggled at your urging that we leave in the pinch of curry. My parents have been on this kick lately where they season almost everything they make with garam masala.

  2. 2

    Susan Scott — June 23, 2011 @ 5:30 am

    I love this recipe, love broccoli! I may have to sub some dairy-free stuff for the cheese… but I’m pretty sure that will still work…

    PS I’m British and I love the term ‘ass-friendly’… tickles me pink


  3. 3

    Lauren at Keep It Sweet — June 23, 2011 @ 7:12 am

    I love guac, what a great way to make it extra healthy!

  4. 4

    branny — June 23, 2011 @ 7:14 am

    I like the looks of this!

  5. 5

    The Cooking Teacher — June 23, 2011 @ 7:59 am

    You are too funny and this looks delicious…a must try! But I have good news, as a nutrition teacher, I can assure you – avocado fat is amazing for you, especially in comparison to the saturated fat in mayo, cheeses and sour cream. Did you know you could make frosting out of avocado instead of butter? Its interesting to say the least… So don’t beat yourself up too much over the gauc :c)

  6. 6

    SnoWhite @ Finding Joy in My Kitchen — June 23, 2011 @ 10:05 am

    We’ve made this before and LOVE it! It’s a healthy alternative to guac.

  7. 7

    Erin — June 23, 2011 @ 10:26 am

    Cheese in a guacamole, but with broccoli? How can you go wrong!

  8. 8

    Tricia — June 23, 2011 @ 10:33 am

    Oh, I’m so intrigued by this! I need to make this asap.

  9. 9

    Paula — June 23, 2011 @ 10:35 am

    Wow! I love broccoli and this dip is new to me! Looks great and the fact that it won’t *rear-end* you is wonderful!

  10. 10

    Jen @ — June 23, 2011 @ 11:03 am

    I’ve seen guac made with a variety of ingredients, but never broccoli! Brilliant.

  11. 11

    Kelly — June 23, 2011 @ 12:29 pm

    I love the inclusion of the cheese, sour cream, and mayo. It sounds like it makes the dip extra creamy. And seriously, I don’t think I can trust anyone who isn’t a guac-a-holic or at least likes it more than a little bit.

  12. 12

    Devon — June 23, 2011 @ 1:05 pm

    Don’t judge me if I make this for Ashlee’s shower this weekend :)

  13. 13

    Katrina — June 23, 2011 @ 3:15 pm

    I’m a guac lover too! This would be a great substitute sometimes! Yum!

  14. 14

    The Teacher Cooks — June 23, 2011 @ 4:39 pm

    This dip looks delicious, but quac is not all that bad especially made without mayo and sour cream. You do make me smile when I read your blog. Thanks!

  15. 15

    Maris (In Good taste) — June 23, 2011 @ 5:34 pm

    What a delicious dip. Love how you added the broccoli!

  16. 16

    Becky — June 23, 2011 @ 6:10 pm

    Oooh, this looks fantastic! What a cool spin on guac : )

  17. 17

    Dianna @ The Kitchen Prep — June 23, 2011 @ 7:49 pm

    Something happened to me during my 3 years living in Texas: I became a guacamole & margarita s-n-o-b. I think it’s because over in TX, I had the opportunity to taste the very best. Now we’re back in FL, and while I do love it here {I’m one of very few rare “natives”, born & raised}, I cannot pretend that we know what we’re doing when it comes to either of these addictive treats. But that’s neither here nor there… This Broc-a-mole looks delish. And let’s be truthful, who’s really gonna know the difference after a few tequila-heavy margaritas. 😉

  18. 18

    Taylor — June 24, 2011 @ 8:51 am

    This is a great idea, I cannot wait to try it! I love guac, like whoa. But this seems like a great alternative dip for the summer. :)

  19. 19

    Samara Link — June 25, 2011 @ 12:47 pm

    Jessica, this is brilliant. I’ve been making mashed cauliflower (instead of mashed potatoes) for a couple years now, and I love them. But I never thought of using broccoli as a replacement for avocado. I’m totally trying this. I was even thinking greek yogurt might work as a sub for the mayo to healthy it up a little more. But either way, great idea! Thank you so much for sharing it … and your story gauc-a-holic story. Very entertaining. :)

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  22. 22

    Kelli H (Made in Sonoma) — November 16, 2011 @ 11:02 pm

    This is so cool! I’m bookmarking this to bring as an appetizer to a party soon. It looks really tasty too!

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